July 2nd: Taking Care of Myself

July 2nd Once during my divorce, I was in the company of a a group of  people who were known to be “care-takers.” We were all laughing, basically making fun of our own character flaws, when someone said, “I knew I was a caretaker when I bought new underwear and socks for everyone in the family except me yet my own socks and underwear were full of holes and ripped elastic.” We all stopped laughing, paused and looked at him… at first he thought he had really shared something inappropriate but after a moment, everyone started laughing again and pulling ripped elastic underwear bands up over their skirt top or pant top, as each and everyone of us showed him some type of destroyed under garment. That day, when I got home, I looked around and noted that everything in my life was in shambles and that I had not been taking care of myself because I was so focused on the despair of my divorce. I soon came to the realization that if I was not taking care of myself, I would be unable to really make headway in my spiritual footwork and ultimately move through and past my pain to become a stronger individual, ready for a new life and maybe even a new love. I immediately emptied my drawers of my worn out clothing, made my bed, straightened my home, showered and then began to put my paperwork in order before calling a friend to head out to the park and go on a walk with me. Taking care of myself, physically, mentally, emotionally is important to my overall well-being and if I choose to neglect myself, I will not be at my best to handle life… or specifically… a crisis. By taking care of myself I put “first things first” and in that way… I can be there for those I love, in particular, my children, who need to see that I can “feel” during a difficult time in my life but also that I can “maintain” a sense of balance when my world has been upended. – “Dear God, help me to take care of myself. Help me to set things right in my own world when I am feeling out of control or full of fear during a crisis.”

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One thought on “July 2nd: Taking Care of Myself

  1. Love this! I came to realize that I can’t do for friends and family, and be myself, without taking time to do personal things. I recently, finally, removed old clothes etc that needed to go, and other reminders of the past in storage that had to go. It was liberating and seems to help the healing! But going forward I have to keep reminding myself I’m making my own decisions now, and not also because of or for a partner. It’s been a real adjustment. I always put him or “us” first!

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