August 19th: Signs

I had a hard time believing in a loving Higher Power.

I had grown up believing that God was a punishing God and therefore, I couldn’t fully put my trust into the idea.

I came to a place in my divorce where I was full of despair.

I felt so totally lost that I looked up and said, “Please, please God… just give me a sign.”

My desperation lead me to look for answers and my answers, were to come from my Higher Power.

During this time period, I had been wearing a necklace with three things on it: my wedding band, a 12-step program ring, and the serenity prayer.

I had been having a hard time with all three.

My marriage was in turmoil and I wasn’t willing to “let go.”

I felt the 12-step program had failed us and drove us further apart.

And, I didn’t have serenity for the life of me.

Every morning, I woke up, put that necklace on and held it close to my heart, where I could feel it weigh heavy against my chest all day long.
Until one day, I got up, reached for my necklace and as I lifted it from the table, watched all three items fall off of the chain.

I had never unclasped this chain since I had bought it.

I had slipped it over my head each time I wore it.

I stood there in silent shock.

It was as if my Higher Power had gently reached out a hand, slipped the items off the chain and said, “Let it go.”

That day, I stopped wearing my necklace.

I took the three items and put them inside of my God box.

I knew that I needed to hand them over to my Higher Power.

I needed to believe in the sign I had been given: a loving God was there to guide me through my pain.

“Dear God, help me to recognize your signs. If I ask for your guidance, make me aware of your answers.”

5 thoughts on “August 19th: Signs

  1. Good Morning!!! I loved this passage. I just found this page a few days ago and I think it’s a great fit for me. What is a God box? I can imagine what it is but since I never heard of it before, please tell me what it is to you. Peace and blessings….

    • Hi Lisa,
      In 12-Step Programs a God Box is a special box where you put the things that are really weighing heavy on your heart. You put them in the box, close the lid, and let your Higher Power take care of them for awhile. I always liked the idea of it and so when I was going through my divorce, I got a small cedar box and I began to put things in it. Sometimes I would write letters to people (my ex-husband in particular) and add that to my box instead of sending it off. It seems funny… but it does help! 🙂 D.

      • Hi w563, this sounds like a great idea!!! It’s kinda like leaving it all at the altar. I definitely have a few letters to the ex I need to put in there so I can stop the emotions and unsaid things from tumbling around in my head all day!! It does not seem funny at all – it seems quite therapeutic. The funny part will come in reading back over all the stuff some time down the line when its not so heavy on your heart anymore!! I will try it because I too would like to see how many things resolved themselves after I let them go and gave them to God. Thanks!!!

  2. I’m so glad…. and there will be a time when it won’t be so heavy on your heart. I was married for 20 years when I went through my divorce…. and my life today is better than I could have imagined 🙂 D.

  3. I never thought that anything could equal the despair of drug addition and alcoholism until I was in the reality of divorce, I just wanted to die, my partner was my god and when he left I was left with nothing or so I thought. I believe gods plan to separate me and let me be on my own so I could reach to him and find the true love that I have always been looking for in people places and things other than my maker. today I have a relationship and totally embrace gods guidance for my life, I my be alone but I am never lonely. when I face the difficulties of the day, I do my part and turn the rest over to god, god does for me what I cannot do for myself. i am spending time with myself and my higher power and for now that is more than enough. god bless.

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