I have had to accept many things in my life:
The deaths of those I have loved.
My divorce.
Illnesses that were hard to overcome.
And though all of these painful moments first consumed me with despair, I learned to move forward by accepting each of them.
At first, I struggled but as my emotions calmed I found acceptance through grace and joy.
I accepted the loss of my loved ones by accepting that death was a part of life.
Yes, many were taken away from me too soon but… the joy that they brought to me and many others while on this Earth was something I could not overlook and left wonderful memories that could never be taken away.
I accepted my divorce in the same way by focusing on the gifts of the union: my two beautiful children.
And the illnesses I had to overcome? Well, the word “overcome” says it all. I am still here today surrounded by many loving family and friends who walked with me during my painful trial.
To say things like “I wish I’d never known him… or I wish I’d never been married… or I wish I’d never suffered” is like saying… “I refuse to love, to open my heart, because then I might have to feel pain.”
Life is full of pain and suffering. Acceptance is key to living. I would never give up the time I had with my loved ones to save myself the pain of their loss. I would never give up my marriage and lose the gift of my children. I would never give up my illnesses because they taught me to live in the day and to be thankful for my good health.
I accept that pain and loss may come my way but if I walk bravely forward in acceptance and faith, I will be greeted with many more gifts when I reach the other side of my heartache.
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“Dear God, help me to accept life on your terms. Help me to see the beauty and joy in all things.”
Daily Divorce Meditations 
Beautiful post, D.
I was reading the posts of the past few days this morning also, and just didn’t have words for them, because I was sitting here literally nodding my head in recognition and agreement.
All of these circle around for me to Acceptance. This whole year has been a process of acceptance — of giving things up, of being thankful for some of the times that were great in my marriage, of accepting what was devastating and that I’ve had to move on, of learning to feel pain and knowing I have to “suffer it” in order to keep growing, and of learning more about oneself. I guess I’m finally realizing that if I had continued my life with a focus on fear and regrets, I wouldn’t learn to move through.
Each day is still very scary, but I’m working on it.
All we can do Patricia is our best as we move through life… but I know that today… I don’t want to waste one minute more of my “present” life lost in sorrow over my “past” life.
This is perfect.
Thank you… I hope you are looking forward to Thanksgiving. 🙂 D.
Thank you… something I work to remember often.
This rings just as true as a year ago.
I actually had a crazy dream the other night where I asked my ex- ” why didn’t you just come home – what you decided to do was crazy, and it was so hard to watch you walk out the door, accepting what you / we were both doing”.
Well acceptance now is the realization that I accepted him as family and had to let go- when I have reveries like that , I know I moved away from a fiction that had to end.
Patricia says:
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November 25, 2014 at 2:09 pm
This rings just as true as a year ago.
I actually had a crazy dream the other night where I asked my ex- ” why didn’t you just come home – what you decided to do was crazy, and it was so hard to watch you walk out the door, accepting what you / we were both doing”.
Well acceptance now is the realization that I accepted him as family and had to let go- when I have reveries like that , I know I moved away from a fiction that had to end.
I remember listening to the Dalai Lama speak about friendship and how when relationships change… we often struggle with the change…. for me… the same applied to marriage. D.