I was once watching a television show where a character told another character, “Just use your imagination.”
And the other character responded with, “Oh no. My imagination is a scary place. I never go in there alone.”
I couldn’t stop laughing. Although I love my imagination when I am creating wonderful things such as; music and writing… I really don’t like my imagination much when it begins to run scenarios.
My mind can take me to some very dark places.
My mind can often assume the worse, refuse to give someone the benefit of the doubt, be absolute in it’s resolution that “I am completely right and you are completely wrong.”
Yes… my imagination can be quite the “scary place.”
In the past… I would take a worry and I would waste my precious time running every possible scenario from the best outcome to the worst outcome so that I would somehow feel prepared for what may lay ahead of me.
Well, there is nothing wrong with logically thinking something through but… when you spend hours, days, weeks, worrying about scenarios that will probably never happen… that is obsession and obsession is a waste of valuable time.
Spending hours creating scenarios that left me feeling helpless, hopeless, full of pain and suffering caused me to become worn ragged by fears that never came true.
Wouldn’t it be better to spend my time being productive? Helping others? Focusing on the positive and moving forward in faith?
Could the worst case scenario happen?
Yes.
Could my greatest fears come true?
Yes.
But how many minutes of joy, serenity, happiness, connection am I willing to give up by letting my imagination hold me hostage in my fear?
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“Dear God, help me to stay in the present moment. Let me see the joy in my world today instead of fear in what may be in my world tomorrow.”
Daily Divorce Meditations 
Wow … Sounds like my mind/imagination over the past several months! And on top of that I had gotten in the habit of worrying about EVERY decision, trying to predict, and yes, running scenario after scenario.
It’s exhausting and not reality.
I’m finally starting to break through it a bit.
Journaling , meditation, yoga … Have to use every tool to try to get a handle in this.
How are you? 🙂 D.
So easy to get into that place where logic is replaced by obsession. I have to think about something… turn it over for a bit… and then let it go! 😀
This is me, exactly, right now, as a I take the first steps forward in my divorce. I am exhausted by these scenarios, and am struggling to disengage from them. Thank you for writing this, I don’t feel so alone.
Diane, first, I am so sorry you are going through this… I began writing these during my own divorce, so that I could share my thoughts and feelings as they were happening, with others. You will get through this. I am now many years divorced and so much happier on the other side.
I used to wear a rubber band around my wrist and snap it each time I let my head run with scenarios. It helped keep me in the present and I was shocked to find out that I was often obsessing on my ex-husband, running scenarios about 30 times in just a couple of minutes! I was completely missing my own life, forgetting the present.
You are not alone. We are all here for you. I’m here for you! D.