When I was younger, before I really began to focus on my spiritual footwork, I believed that the No Contact rule was cruel.
How could I just stop talking to someone I once loved?
How could I act as if they never mattered in my life?
Would I really just walk by them; barely acknowledge their presence, as if they were merely an acquaintance?
It seemed that to follow the No Contact rule was a way to punish the person I had once loved, a way of skipping the moral high ground when ending a relationship.
But… as I grew older, I realized that the No Contact rule was not about the other person… the No Contact rule was for me.
I was able to see that by holding firmly to my rule, I was allowing myself the necessary time to heal by breaking away from the person I loved.
This was a way of creating space, so that I was able to:
Fall out of love…
Open myself up to the possibility of someone new…
But if I held on to my past… I couldn’t move forward.
The No Contact rule helps me to have control over the only thing I can control: myself and my actions.
The only way for me to let go of someone who no longer chooses to share their life with me, is by creating a significant amount of no contact time, while I work through my pain and my past to move forward towards my new life.
“Dear God, help me to have the strength to keep my distance. Help me to be loving and kind to myself and allow myself the time I need to heal without an interruption in my spiritual process.”