November 25th: Love

Sometimes it can be hard for people to say the words, “I love you.”

It often seems as if they are holding back for fear that by admitting the feeling they will somehow be “beholden” to you.

Or… that by opening up, and sharing their truth, that it will be turned against them or lead them towards vulnerability and maybe even heartbreak and pain.

Declaring love, out loud, can be difficult.

Especially after going through a terrible loss such as a divorce.

It took me time after the end of my marriage to be brave enough to declare my love to someone once again but,

as time moved me through the pain, and I healed from my emotional wounds, I found my voice and braved the words.

For me, saying “I love you” after my divorce was my way of admitting that I was stronger than the pain that had thrown me into despair.

Saying “I love you” meant that I was well on my way to recovery and willing to live life once again.

“Dear God, help me to show my love in all of my words and deeds in my day-to-day life. Help me to give those I love what they need so that they will feel cherished always.”

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6 thoughts on “November 25th: Love

  1. I’ve been able to express love to family and friends much more comfortably since I decompressed from the divorce .
    But, I don’t know how that will happen when I get more involved personally with someone new.
    I’ve been reluctant to accept dates and intimate times – I’m not yet sure what “true” emotions will be .

    • You’ve come along way in a year, Patricia. I’ve watched/read the change in your words… another year from now… you will be on a totally different page and interesting in people that bring out the best in you and know what a thoughtful/reflective person you are. πŸ™‚ D.

    • John, I promise you will get there πŸ™‚ I did not date/see ANYONE for a year after the break-up of my twenty year marriage. I just wasn’t interested. I felt that my foundation had been knocked out from under me and that I needed to be on my own to figure out what I wanted from life after my divorce… and just to HEAL. When I did begin to date of course, I chose carbon copies of my ex-husband which of course… didn’t work. πŸ™‚ It took me another five years to move away from “type” and find someone really great to say I love you. πŸ™‚ D.

  2. It’s funny … Another year later . I’m not there yet … To meet someone . That’s ok.

    But , the holidays are the toughest for me. Two of my best friends , my Paternal Grandmother , and my Father , died the day after thanksgiving , and the day before Christmas, respectively.
    My later years with my husband before the divorce were just lousy. Sad.
    I have one living immediate family member .
    I remember for years , back a bit, hosting “orphan thanksgiving ” for all our buds who either didn’t have family , or couldn’t get home.
    One of my closest friends called me today. We live close to each other as well. I have about 0 family left, she has abundance. And her children are my kids too πŸ™‚ as I’ve watched them grow .

    She said – get over here!
    I know this time is so hard for you and you never say a word. I love you. We love you. Please come.
    Family is family . Close friends are family.
    I’ve always had major love for those around me .
    I had forgotten that my life now had so much joy and no grief now.
    Happy Thanksgiving, D.
    All the best

    • I love this… from Finding Forester:

      Losing family… obliges us to find our family. Not always the family that is our blood, but the family that can became our blood

      So true.

      Have a wonderful Thanksgiving with your friend. πŸ™‚ D.

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