November 30th: Thoughts

November 29th

There are times when I let my thoughts run rampant in my head.

I often catch myself spending too many moments of my precious day obsessing over things I have no control over.

When my husband and I divorced, I would often wonder what he was doing? Who he was with? How I could fix things and bring him back to me.

I thought that once I had all of my thoughts worked out regarding our problems… that my obsessive thinking would stop.

But these days, many years after my divorce… I still catch myself obsessing over other things, other people, and I realize… that if I get into the habit of letting these thoughts run “rampant” in my mind… as I have in the past… and seem to keep doing in my present… I will end up with a lot of wasted moments.

I have to learn to control my thoughts, my obsessive thinking, and stay in the day.

It is of no help to me… or anyone around me for that matter… if I am unable to work with the reality of my present.

I don’t have time to ruin my day wondering why someone doesn’t want to be with me, or what they may be doing right now, or why that person at work snapped at me the other day, or why I don’t have exactly what I want in life, the moment that I believe I should have it.

Obsessive thoughts waste time.

I must train my mind to stay in the moment… to value what I have right in front of me… work to remain in the present and positive in my thoughts.

I must stop my obsessive thinking before I even start.

Obsessive thoughts can not help me to solve a problem. Obsessive thoughts cause me to become out of control, break my serenity, and keep me from living fully in the day.

“Dear God, help me to let go of my problems. Help me to calm my mind and give over my obsessive thoughts. Help me to stay in the day and value the moment.”

12 thoughts on “November 30th: Thoughts

      • I recently watched a sermon about changing… our minds… taking authority over our thoughts and minds. It only takes some cognitive thinking, and self-discipline. When I find myself thinking with nostalgia of my married life or my ex-husband, I stop, pray for him, and move on. After practicing this for a few weeks, I’ve noticed I don’t think about him very much anymore.

      • Yes… these days I rarely think of my ex. But what I found interesting, as time moved on, I would find other people, things, situations to obsess on… I really have to work to reign it in… prayer and solitude and catching myself in the act and choosing to stop… all help to remove my old pattern of ruminating.

  1. Exactly what i was thinking about. How obsessive thoughts and scenarios can become your reality when in fact they are made up and have no meaning at all. Staying in the present and being able to remain there is often difficult but that truly is all we have and it is enough. This reminds me of another meditation you wrote about; letting go of the rope-accepting that no matter how much I want something to go my way-it won’t unless that’s how it wants to go.
    This is probably one of the most difficult challenges for me in my search for serenity and change within me. Giving over my struggle and having faith that I am on the path I am meant to be on.

    • This is so true Michele. Even after years of spiritual work I still struggle with obsessive thoughts at times. One of my mentors loves to say to me “and the story you are telling yourself right now is…”

      So easy to rob my very own serenity… to hi-jack my day with these thoughts.

      So important to stay in the present.

  2. I’ll be working on this everyday… always!
    Meditation early a.m. helps — trying to get into the everyday mode.
    Great post.

    • I like to get up early and write… it is my quiet time… I think rampant thoughts are always a problem for me and something I have to watch constantly… or practice containing constantly. 🙂 d.

  3. I struggle with obsessive thoughts. It was one of the many downfalls I brought to the marriage. My husband and I have just decided to divorce for many factors. I can’t change him or his habits that were his contribution to our demise. It’s a constant struggle to move from my mind what he was 10 years ago, those were happy times, I pray it gets better and it will but time heals.

    • Yes… obsessive thoughts are intense. I have to really work on that when I get into high stress situations of any kind. It will get better, Carolyn. I promise. It will. I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but time will heal you. D.

  4. Hi D,
    Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.
    I enjoyed more than I have in recent years, with my friend/tribe 🙂
    I still have the early morning chatter/obsessing thing now and then- and it comes from anxiety about “what ifs” and trying to still fix situations or people I can’t fix!
    And I agree with all here that focus on the present and meditation help so much !

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