Over the course of my marriage, I often took on more activities then I should have to distract myself from my fears.
I was so overwhelmed with the reality of my life, the fact that things weren’t really working between my husband and myself, that I filled my time with endless occupations, afraid to face the truth.
Today, when I catch myself working to be too busy to think, I stop and I look at what is really going on.
It isn’t easy to face fear.
It isn’t easy to admit that life can be scary and out-of-control.
But, by looking at what I am really struggling with, I can begin to address my problems and move forward on my spiritual path.
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“Dear God, help me to trust in your plan. Help me to walk in faith instead of live in fear.”
Daily Divorce Meditations 
Fear is such an inhibitor. I always remind myself of the courage it took to end my marriage. My fear held me back for such a long time. Although there is so much uncertainty that comes as a result of change, I celebrate the unknown and all the possibilities that await me. Nothing would have been possible if I stayed in my unhappy marriage. Thanks for your post. I often get overly focused on staying busy and see that pattern of avoidance. 🙂
It can really hit you hard when you realize you’ve been doing that “avoidance dance!”
Definitely an “Aha!” moment.
Wow; I agree with both of you!
And what I’ve felt lately is a little less fear and more what I think is anxiety… Each morning is a new day, my life in the long term is undefined, and memories / reverie occur all the time.
Yes it’s over but refining life is stressful , exciting and unpredictable ! :-0
Most of our escape/avoid behaviours are very subtle…. at least from us. Others can help us recognize what is really going on. Albert Einstein is credited with saying something to the effect that “We can’t solve problems with the same thinking we used to create them”. Outside perspective is typically different thinking that I have found invaluable in spotting my own self-deceptions.
Chaz that is so true… I have had to really practice stepping “outside” of my perspective to really see what is going on… and still… to this day… when I catch myself taking on a slew of activities I have to look at what is going on… I usually find that I am feeling fearful or vulnerable somewhere in my life and I need to face it. D.
Chaz, as they say our own worst thinking got us here… Jon Kabat-Zinn has some good thoughts on meditation…the best one to get me out of my own head until I started doing ACIM was “Think about Thinking.” Krista Tippet from On Being iterviewed him and he talked about the science of meditation. The thinking about thinking can really help sometimes. Peace light and love all
Chaz how are you doing? It’s been a year now… How are things going in your world? D.