It took time for me to see my marriage and my divorce clearly.
Friends would tell me that, “I just needed time to get over my wounds.”
Others said, “You will have perspective on this situation once time passes.”
The advice was hard to swallow when all I wanted was an immediate release from my pain but…
Time did bring perspective.
I was able to see that my husband had suited me perfectly for many years of my life, and even though I was disappointed and hurt when he chose to leave, after a significant amount of time passed… I could see that what had suited me perfectly as a young woman no longer suited me as the woman I had become.
My husband and I were on different life paths and once I had perspective… I knew that we were better off as friends than as a married couple.
Today, after going through my divorce, I have found that it is easier for me to accept that emotions, passions, and turmoil will calm with time.
I don’t always enjoy waiting for perspective… but I do look forward to the clarity that will come with it.
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“Dear God, help me to be patient. Help me to wait for time to bring me clarity after enduring my hardships.”
I can relate a LOT to this. When my X Husband and I got married, we WERE right, and then we began to change as people and saw that what we each wanted for our lives was completely different. We are lucky enough tto have a friendly relationship (this is a brand new development BTW) and understand that it is mutual we knew we could no longer move forward. It gets easier, but no one can tell you when or how. Its different for everyone. Take all the time you need to heal
It definitely took us time to get to the “friendship” level after our divorce, several years in fact… and we still have our moments but they are few and far between. Just the other day my ex got on the phone to tell me how much he loved my new pet chicken. : ) He was at my house visiting our son. Today, we both love and respect each other and often talk through problems with each other. After 20 years of marriage, we know each other very well.
I think you might really like this post by a friend of mine: http://twominutesofgrace.wordpress.com/
Apologies for placing a link on your site, but I do think you’ll see why. I don’t make a habit of this. I enjoy your honesty. Will be back!
It’s a great link and I’m so glad you thought to post it. : ) D.