May 18th: Milestones and Silver Linings

May 18th-

When I was in the midst of my divorce, each moment, of each day, seemed like a struggle:

To get up without becoming physically ill from anxiety.

To make it through the work day without crying in public.

To make it through the night without waking.

To be present for my children when my mind was obsessed with the despair of my loss.

It was a never ending cycle of heartache and I had no idea when time would move me through the pain.

But time did move me through… and soon… I began to count the small milestones, the markers that gave me hope… faith that I would soon be healed:

The day that I woke up and though weary… did not become ill from nervous anxiety.

The day that I did not cry in public.

The first night of restful sleep.

The first moment with my children when I was once again truly present in mind and body.

These may seem like small milestones to someone looking in, outside of the pain, but to me… they signaled that relief was coming if I just had faith and kept moving forward.

My divorce was one of the most painful experiences of my life but today, I am thankful for the lessons I learned from it.

My silver lining is in the knowledge that I have strength beyond measure, compassion for others who now suffer what I suffered, and that I was willing to give myself whole-heartedly, committed, to someone I loved.

My divorce changed my perspective for the better: It reminded me that empathy is key to life.

“Dear God, help me to light the path for others that walk behind me. Help me to be present for those that need my experience, strength and hope today.”

7 thoughts on “May 18th: Milestones and Silver Linings

  1. Great post… empathy is the key to life.
    I suspect this divorce will be one of, if not the most, painful experiences of my life.
    I can start to look back at progress now, but the healing process will be arduous.
    Tough lessons learned and realized now, as well as waking up some days and looking around at all I’m grateful for now!

  2. Reblogged this on Missives by Michelle and commented:
    It is amazing when you are going through a situation how many people you meet that are going through or have gone through the same thing. When God allows you to suffer I believe He sends “earthly angels” that can empathize. I know I had a few and one in particular that we walked such identical foot steps that our divorces were final on the same day one year apart.

  3. I guess a milestone today is 2 years since I posted thoughts about the divorce …
    And at that time only being final about 6 months 🙂

    Had dinner with some friends last night – one is two months from divorce being final , one who has been struggling with getting filing going ( 18 months and counting ) and who has been married 40 years ( and made it through many ups and downs ) . I have a new perspective on empathy , and also it’s a wake up call to how many of us ( men and women ) experience so much change and tough decisions in our lifetimes .
    And for all the days and years I come here 🙂
    You are right .
    Time heals ; things get better ; and we can be supportive to others more than we realize 🙂

  4. And I have suggested just that!
    You have made a difference in MY life and well being 🙂
    Glad what I’m working on now is what the hell to do with things in storage the past couple of years I thought I couldn’t release .

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