June 11th: Friendships and Goals

June 11th Goals

When I suffered the painful setback of my divorce I was so full of despair that my goals dissipated.

Everything I had been working for seemed pointless without the love of my husband and so… depressed and weary… I let everything go.

It seemed the smallest thing was too difficult to do:

Sleep.

Shower.

Eat.

Work.

My days were full of endless sadness.

I was fortunate to have comfort from a work colleague, a woman who became like a mother figure to me, who would see me each morning and say, “We just have to get through today. And… if you can’t get through today… just get through the next few minutes. I will be right here.”

I would go in my room and try to teach my students, then excuse myself, walk across the hallway, where she would walk out of her own classroom, wipe the tears from my eyes, hug me close, and then say, “Just until the bell rings. Just make it until the bell rings. I’m right here if you need me.”

I cannot thank her enough for being my strength when my strength was gone.

She got me through those first very painful months and each time I hit a small goal:

Making it through a day without crying…

Sleeping through the night…

Being able to keep a meal down…

She was there to cheer me on.

And when my goals became bigger:

Going back to school for my Master’s Degree…

Writing…

Buying my first home…

She continued to offer me support.

During times of despair we need someone to champion us… to see our small progress as we struggle to overcome pain.

Today, I offer my own experience and strength, and hope that my words, my presence, offers comfort to those who need it.

“Dear God, help me to give my compassion to those in need. Help me to be present for those who long for comfort.”

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8 thoughts on “June 11th: Friendships and Goals

  1. Reblogged this on Missives by Michelle and commented:
    This is so true! I had a similar friend that would call me daily to give me words of encouragement. She was a year ahead of me in the process and had walked an almost identical path. She was the only one who could understand why I cried over a man who didn’t deserve it.

    I pray that my sorrow will not be in vain. If I can help ease the pain for someone going through this hell and give back that which was given to me, I will be blessed.

    I would encourage you to send a note or a brief phone call to someone you know that is struggling. Whether it be from a divorce, death, diagnosis of a chronic illness, etc.. words of kindness and empathy may be their blessing in disguise.

    • Thank you Michelle, I’m so glad my post meant something to you personally…. I like knowing that I am “passing it on”…. I was so thankful to have someone there for me in the first year of my divorce. D. 🙂

  2. That was such a wonderful post – D. , and Michelle.
    Last year was hell and I relived and related to your comments as I read them.
    Grief creates so many difficult emotions and perceptions of reality. On top of it “losing someone ” is devastating regardless of the situation .
    Last year at this time I was still grinding through living with my soon to be ex , and the crying , nausea , weight loss , insomnia etc was relentless !
    I’m moving through to the “other side” now and coming up on a year since we each moved from our home.
    Minutes hours months — all of it. Some days are still so hard … But D, I’m so glad you’re here- I’m getting through and much of it is due to your kind and wise words ☺️

  3. I see your growth in all of your messages, Patricia. You are getting there and I’m glad I was able to comfort you during your pain… D.

  4. everyday I look forward to these readings, they have been my salvation. it’s been a year now since my divorce and have gone through all the traits expressed in this reading and now beyond them, thank god and thank you, we are blessed.

    • I am so happy to hear that… I first wrote these meditations because when I was going through my divorce… I couldn’t find any meditations specific to just… divorce. I’m here for you… and I will be here for you. D.

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